Autonomy or heteronomy?

I see the sun rising; I hardly sleep, else if I do I sleep for days at a time.

There is no one else like me out there. I suppose we all feel that way at times; but I suspect most deal with it by abandoning their individuality or altering it so much as to be one with the herd. The more I read Nietzsche, the more I can understand why it is important to cull the herd.

I feel sad for those who lose their selves to appease the herd. But in another way; I should despise them; for they lack autonomy. One cannot treat that which has no autonomy as a being that has rights; do we talk of pencils having rights?

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Two desiderata

After my meeting with Bastion; I went into my study; I went through the works of Spinoza and read Adorno as light reading. I begin to realise the genius of Kant. While going through some Spinozist demonstrations; Enter Destre.

 Destre: You have been busy; brother.

Sinistre: I have been organising and mobilising groups; for the dream.

Destre: The beautiful dream; of children challenging schoolmen; of schoolmen challenging university men; and university folk challenging themselves. A world where free questioning and critical enquiry is the rule and tradition is only held insofar as it is rational or appropos to keep them.

Sinistre: I do not wish to live this life. My ideas are not yet matured; I still need to read more Kant, more Leibniz, more Kripke, more Davidson, Wittgenstein-

Destre: As do I; friend, but your duty is to your people.

Sinistre: I don’t have any true comrades anymore; the ideals of Trugrar are as dead as his disciples.

Destre: My mind is weak; my head aches; each morning I wake up I wonder why I keep going, why I get out of bed, I assume there is a purpose but there is none. All my life I spend in quiet contemplation; in constant physical pain.

Sinistre: I too desire the life of solitude; I once wanted love, glory and wealth. Either I realised I could never achieve it, or I realised that it was not worth getting.

Destre: You dreamt that I would never intefere with your life again; or disturb you.

Sinistre: I dreamt to live with Lucille; spent the rest of my life with her; have children. We even knew the names of our kids. Before I got married; I’d have lots of fun.

Destre: You failed in every possible respect of being a human being

Sinistre: How accurate. I guess that’s why we are here.

Destre: I am here to tell you that you need to keep going; every queen needs a knight, and you will be that knight; you have the strength, resilience and wit to defend the project of reason; or, at least; you will, eventually.

Sinistre: I desire the life of contemplation

Destre: I desire the life of embodied cognition; but we can’t have everything we want. It’s the only reason I get up in the morning; the hope that one day, reason will conquer nature and humanity will truly be perfect creation.

Sinistre: You must continue to do your reading; but I need you more than anything.-

“We are fundamentally on our own…”

Hello world!

This is the first post of my new move to wordpress; I’m not a new blogger; but this will be my new ‘official’ blog; the old blogs had served me well (thank you Blogger and Friendster Blogs), but I need greater services to express myself on this strange world of the internet.

Agency-dependent values

Sinistre was lucky to have good friends. A group of people who have shared experience and share a mutual affection for one another. Sinistre is the last of the Trugraions; an elite group of individuals from all walks of life united in their vision of a new humanity; a new society.

As time went on; the Trugraions died out. Some of them abandoned their values and became normal citizens of the state. Others died in despair; waiting patiently for a revolution or a breaking point in humanity’s self-indulgent destruction; but the time never came. Their own personal desires and life aims fell apart; the search for romantic love; personal glory and material success. They achieved none of those.

Some of the Trugrarions believed that the leader Trugra had false ideals; that he was a false prophet. All of the members had doubt. Some abandoned the teachings altogether, while some re-interpreted the master; while others, wished the master was correct, but in hoping and trying to achieve the new world; they brought great harm upon themselves.

Sinistre met with an old friend and sympathiser to Trugrar; Bastion. Bastion was not very close to Sinistre; but was his oldest, and perhaps, only true companion.

"I have experienced much hardship; the likes of which you will never imagine", Sinistre said; his eyes, although fixed; stared at nothing, despite the vast expanse of nature present in front of him. The cool winds flay his matted hair.

"I cannot imagine your pain, Sinistre; and although I say I am always here for you; you realise you are at a point where you are fundamentally isolated", Bastion, although an empathetic person; was completely out of touch with reality. In some way; he tries to reconcile his knowledge with his beliefs, but in many others; he is a dogmatist. For this reason, and others, Sinistre can never be truly close to his only friend. "Their lives have no meaning, unless you make it have meaning; unless you live for them".

Sinistre: Bastion, I cannot continue this project alone; I cannot even continue my life, but I know I must. Aeneas lost his family; his nation; his dignity; but what I have lost is far greater. Although my heart still beats, and my stature erect; I have died long ago.

Bastion: That, I cannot understand. The value of a person is accorded insofar as they are remembered among contemporaries. If no one knew of a child’s existence; no one would mourn their loss.

Sinistre: That is an absurd statement, Bastion. But sometimes I think there is merit to your stupidity. No one cares if a hero had died if they did not know the criterion of a hero; when ignorance is the rule; it is the criterion also. Bastion; what you don’t realise is that I do not mourn my own death; but the impending end of humanity itself.

Bastion: I too envisage a downfall in humanity; that is why I seek to repair the gene pool and create a replaceable army of human slaves to serve us, the masters; we will live a good life then, one where wars are conflicts that are quickly resolved; and where happiness is the currency.

Sinistre: You are insane, Bastianicus. You are a man of integers and sets; not HUMAN LIVES AND VALUES! Stick to what you are good at; and don’t you dare try and claim mastery of a science you have no grounding in. I grieve for the ignorant like you; whose idealism is far from transcendental. Although you are my friend; I hope we never come at ends as political enemies; for I shall defeat you in the battle of words.

Bastion: But it is the battle of arms that defines a winner.

Sinistre: And no one remembers the heroic enemy; for they are ignorant of the criterion of heroism.

Bastion: How erudite, Trugrar would have been proud; you are so much different to your old master.

Sinistre: I claim no master but the fathers of the enlightenment; and the number by one alone.

Bastion: You may think you have lost your future, and your past; but you are a dear friend to me. I trust you more than anyone who may share my ideals of words. You have survived the torrents, the earthquakes, the tsunami and the volcanic eruption; you have been thrown about, burnt and frozen, but you still stand. You have lost the spirit and optimism you once had; but what remains, is you and truly you; and it is that which I deem your true self.

Sinistre: I must go; I must attend to exegetical matters.

Bastion: I must attend political matters; we are contrasting characters; star-crossd truly.

Sinistre: People like you come like the rains; too frequently. You are not special.

Bastion: What about you?

Sinistre: Ad hominem reply; you should know better, hythlodaeus

A new high culture

I call into the moonlight.
The sky fixed me with its stare.
Filled me with razor-teeth.
And covered me in hair.
Did you ever think, that the stink,
Of the flesh, that I suck, would be you, sad fuck.

(M. Hietala and J. Tolsa)

To defeat the enemy, we must use her weapons; but not be consumed by their ideology.

Let us assume the enlightenment has failed; let us assume that the only response we can have to the status quo is pessimism; such as that of Weber and Nietzsche, and also carried on by the continentals.

Imagine a culture which expresses this; doubt in the political system; the oppression of the dionysian; where opposition to the status quo and sentimentality must be expressed through sentimentality and the status quo.

This will be a bloody war; and not even the just can be good. The greatness will come generations after. High culture will come through the degradation of the low.

It will not come in my lifetime, I know that now.