Some facebook norms

How to be facebook-savvy:

1. Don’t have too many applications, that’s so fucking proletarian
2. Don’t have inciminating photos
3. Facebook information: do not be too explicit of strangers about your personal life if you don’t want to be: sometimes people judge if you are a homosexual, a liberal, a conservative, religious or conversely, atheist.
4. Don’t try to be clever. It’ is so fucking vacuous and pseudo-interesting to just say something like “oh, but how could I possibly be described in a few lines of text”. Well, if you said that, that means you are a goth teenage girl, and a bitch, or if you are male, a sex pervert.
5. Don’t do quotes of your friends, that’s so fucking inane and stupid; unless they are clever and fun quotes, not something they said that was funny at a drunk night that doesn’t seem funny to anyone else, or yourself currently, but you just have had to have been there!
6. Purging is good…that is, facebook purging; remove your unnecessary facebook ‘friends’.
7. What is the condition of being a facebook friend for the facebook savvy? Here are some necessary and sufficient conditions:

i. You have to have known them physically (Necessary but not sufficient); this doesn’t entail non-physical friends don’t count. Michael is facebook friends with Zachary Hietala!!
ii. They are actual friends (sufficient condition)
iii. They are family (neither sufficient nor necessary, however)
iv. Professional contacts- be careful how you stay in relation with them. Do you want them to know you fully personally? One member of Areopagus has the problem of others coming to find his interests in music most interesting…and metallic

8. A final warning: your facebook profile is not just for people who know you, but also people who knew you, and people who want to know you. You decide, and you choose what you tell them on your profile. They could be employers, friends, enemies, or rivals. Sometimes information is a weapon. Be very very careful.

9. An opus thought: here are some reasons why I’ve blocked people, or facebook-purged someone off my list:

i. I don’t like them
ii. I hate them
iii. I don’t want anything to do with them
iv. I don’t want to engage with them personally, or in a non-professional, or different environment than I do before (consider for instance, if one teaches, or has a client etc.)
v. They invite me to too many events
vi. They promote their events and themselves or commercial ventures in a shameless manner.

And one further thing. Virtual identity is just as subtle as real identity can be; only the artful can pull off deception and fear while maintaining genuineness. The justice of your own words are that, you can’t lie even when you try to. Truths wrapped in lies are more sensuous than truths proper; but lies when used to hide weakness, are always disgusting.



One thought on “Some facebook norms

  1. 10. don’t out yourself as a socially inept petty self and social media obsessed pseudo intellectual sociopath if you want to be taken seriously, lol

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